One of my most favorite movies is Shall We Dance. It’s about a husband’s mid-life crisis and how it leads to the restoration and re-enlivening of their marriage.
When Beverly the wife (played by Susan Sarandon) suspects her husband John (played by Richard Gere) is having an affair, she hires a detective. Eventually, she realizes that this is not the right way to deal with her suspicions. She needs to trust her husband and the journey that he’s on. When she meets with the detective to cancel the investigation, he doesn’t understand her reasoning. The explanation she gives him is:
“Why is it, do you think, that people get married? … We need a witness to our lives. There’s a billion people on the planet; what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things, all of it, all of the time, every day. You’re saying ‘Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness’.”
Marriage is a lifelong commitment to our sweetheart that says: “You matter”. It is the ongoing assurance that even if everyone else rejects you, overlooks your abilities at work, or ignores your needs, you matter to me. It’s the daily embrace of waking up together to face another day’s joys and hardships with a partner who will celebrate your small successes as well as your big accomplishments and who will care about your little frustrations as much as your major trials.
This caring, this attitude of “you matter” is rooted in Christ, who says, “You matter so much that I died for you, and I will do anything you let Me do to take you to heaven where we can enjoy each other for all of eternity.”
God designed marriage to be the embodiment of Christ caring for us.
- How do I convey to my sweetheart that he/she matters to me?
- How does my sweetheart convey that I matter to him/her?
Strengthen your relationship:
Discuss together the answers to the above questions. Then describe how your beloved conveys, “You matter to me”, and explain why it means so much to you. Afterward, pray together, asking the Holy Spirit to give you a fully understanding of how much you both matter to Jesus.
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© 2017 by Terry Modica of Good News Ministries